funny retirement books

What is a funny retirement book you might ask? A funny retirement book is something that will not only teach you how to retire successfully, but also entertain you with some dry humour, fun and maybe even some inappropriate jokes and stories.

Funny retirement books can provide a lot of information and inspiration surrounding life after working. Inside the covers of these books you will find tales from people who have already retired and passed the age milestone; you will also discover important tips and inspirational quotes to help you in your own retirement planning.

Whether you’re a baby boomer nearing retirement or a young person just beginning your working life, these funny retirement books will help you dust off the cobwebs that come with being over 40 or just help change your point of view on aging. If you have no interest in this sort of reading, at least take a gander at the cover art. Unless you’re a serious stick in the mud…

Before you start thinking you’ll need to cancel your upcoming retirement party, take a deep breath and think about these funny retirement books. They’ll help put the fun back into the big 5-0 (or 60 or 60-something).

Retiring from your career is a huge life milestone whether you’re happy about it or not. Funny retirement quotes make light of a person’s final job and help people cope with their new stage of life.

retirement quotes

Funny Retirement Quotes for Coworkers
If you have a good relationship with a coworker, it can be fun to have one last laugh with a funny retirement phrase.

retirement quotes

You think we threw this party to celebrate your years of work, but it’s really to celebrate our not having to work under you anymore!
I’m so sorry for your loss. No one is ever going to call you “boss” again.
You picked a great time to retire, we were just about to start a revolt against your leadership style.
Where will we be without our fearless leader? Oh, that’s right, we’ll be relaxed and happy!
It’s sad you can’t even be the boss of yourself in retirement. I’m sure your wife has been looking forward to this for years.
You worked so hard all these years to become what, a couch bum?
If I’ve learned one thing from some of the most successful people in life it’s this, don’t come out of retirement, if it didn’t work for Brett Favre, it can’t work for anyone.
When you retire do you turn into the old version of Boss Baby? Will you be wearing a suit and tie while you nap on the couch?
I’m sorry, I thought you were already retired since we never see you doing any work.
It must be so hard leaving us all knowing you’ll actually have to do things for yourself in retirement.
Hilarious Famous Retirement Quotes
You can count on your favorite movies and TV shows to provide the best humorous quotes about retirement.

In the movie John Wick: Chapter 2 there’s a great exchange where Bowery King says, “You’re not very good at retiring,” and John replies, “I’m workin’ on it.”
In the movie Zoolander 2 Derek Zoolander says, “I’m going to retire, withdraw from public life, and become a hermit crab.”
Kaulder shares his humorous retirement wisdom in the movie The Last Witch Hunter saying, “I’ve seen people get old, retire, and die. Rarely on the same day.”
In Captain America: Civil War, Hawkeye shares everyone’s greatest fear about leaving their career saying, “I retire for what, like, five minutes, and it all goes to sh*$.”
In the movie Xanadu, character Danny McGuire says, ” I’m what you might call retired. It’s a refined name for bum.”
Rick Harrison from the popular TV show Pawn Stars joked in an interview, “My dad’s the type that would die six months after retiring, so I plan to have him work here forever. Retirement Quotes for Coworkers

If you have a good relationship with a coworker, it ca

Funny Retirement Quotes for Coworkers
If you have a good relationship with a coworker, it can be fun to have one last laugh with a funny retirement phrase.

retirement quotes for workers

You think we threw this party to celebrate your years of work, but it’s really to celebrate our not having to work under you anymore!
I’m so sorry for your loss. No one is ever going to call you “boss” again.
You picked a great time to retire, we were just about to start a revolt against your leadership style.
Where will we be without our fearless leader? Oh, that’s right, we’ll be relaxed and happy!
It’s sad you can’t even be the boss of yourself in retirement. I’m sure your wife has been looking forward to this for years.
You worked so hard all these years to become what, a couch bum?
If I’ve learned one thing from some of the most successful people in life it’s this, don’t come out of retirement, if it didn’t work for Brett Favre, it can’t work for anyone.
When you retire do you turn into the old version of Boss Baby? Will you be wearing a suit and tie while you nap on the couch?
I’m sorry, I thought you were already retired since we never see you doing any work.
It must be so hard leaving us all knowing you’ll actually have to do things for yourself in retirement.
Hilarious Famous Retirement Quotes
You can count on your favorite movies and TV shows to provide the best humorous quotes about retirement.

  • I hate to leave you all here, but I love the idea of me walking out the door more!
  • We were sad to hear you’re retiring until we realized it means one less person absentmindedly hitting “reply all” needlessly on emails.
  • You might be excited about retirement, but we’re not throwing you a party because we realize it means we’re each getting some of your work added to ours.
  • Don’t be one of those boomerang retirees. Even if your job’s still here, we don’t want you to be miserable with us!
  • We thought you were a team player, and there’s no “I” in team, although there is one in “retirement.”
  • Working with you was a real pleasure. Let your husband know he can use me as a reference if he has any doubts about that.
  • It’s going to be so weird not seeing you every day. What’s your name again?
  • Happy Retirement. We’ll always have each other. Except you, you won’t have us because you won’t be in the office.
  • I’m not sure why you’d want to re-tire, we’re all tired already!
  • Retirement can’t be that different from work; you still get to use sheets, visit docs, and steal other people’s food out of the fridge.

Funny Retirement Quotes

  • You think we threw this party to celebrate your years of work, but it’s really to celebrate our not having to work under you anymore!
  • I’m so sorry for your loss. No one is ever going to call you “boss” again.
  • You picked a great time to retire, we were just about to start a revolt against your leadership style.
  • Where will we be without our fearless leader? Oh, that’s right, we’ll be relaxed and happy!
  • It’s sad you can’t even be the boss of yourself in retirement. I’m sure your wife has been looking forward to this for years.
  • You worked so hard all these years to become what, a couch bum?
  • If I’ve learned one thing from some of the most successful people in life it’s this, don’t come out of retirement, if it didn’t work for Brett Favre, it can’t work for anyone.
  • When you retire do you turn into the old version of Boss Baby? Will you be wearing a suit and tie while you nap on the couch?
  • I’m sorry, I thought you were already retired since we never see you doing any work.
  • It must be so hard leaving us all knowing you’ll actually have to do things for yourself in retirement.

Funny Retirement Quotes for Coworkers

If you have a good relationship with a cowo

Funny Retirement Quotes for Coworkers
If you have a good relationship with a coworker, it can be fun to have one last laugh with a funny retirement phrase.

  • I hate to leave you all here, but I love the idea of me walking out the door more!
  • We were sad to hear you’re retiring until we realized it means one less person absentmindedly hitting “reply all” needlessly on emails.
  • You might be excited about retirement, but we’re not throwing you a party because we realize it means we’re each getting some of your work added to ours.
  • Don’t be one of those boomerang retirees. Even if your job’s still here, we don’t want you to be miserable with us!
  • We thought you were a team player, and there’s no “I” in team, although there is one in “retirement.”
  • Working with you was a real pleasure. Let your husband know he can use me as a reference if he has any doubts about that.
  • It’s going to be so weird not seeing you every day. What’s your name again?
  • Happy Retirement. We’ll always have each other. Except you, you won’t have us because you won’t be in the office.
  • I’m not sure why you’d want to re-tire, we’re all tired already!
  • Retirement can’t be that different from work; you still get to use sheets, visit docs, and steal other people’s food out of the fridge.

Funny Retirement Quotes

  • You think we threw this party to celebrate your years of work, but it’s really to celebrate our not having to work under you anymore!
  • I’m so sorry for your loss. No one is ever going to call you “boss” again.
  • You picked a great time to retire, we were just about to start a revolt against your leadership style.
  • Where will we be without our fearless leader? Oh, that’s right, we’ll be relaxed and happy!
  • It’s sad you can’t even be the boss of yourself in retirement. I’m sure your wife has been looking forward to this for years.
  • You worked so hard all these years to become what, a couch bum?
  • If I’ve learned one thing from some of the most successful people in life it’s this, don’t come out of retirement, if it didn’t work for Brett Favre, it can’t work for anyone.
  • When you retire do you turn into the old version of Boss Baby? Will you be wearing a suit and tie while you nap on the couch?
  • I’m sorry, I thought you were already retired since we never see you doing any work.
  • It must be so hard leaving us all knowing you’ll actually have to do things for yourself in retirement.

NOTABLE RETIREMENT BOOK

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